Self Esteem Is Irrelevant

There is no such thing as self-esteem, because there is no fixed self.

Self-esteem may win the prize for the most overplayed and undersupported notion in psychology.

I can’t tell you how many times I have had clients tell me they wanted to “improve self-esteem” as a therapy goal.

Let’s make this short, sweet and to the point:

1. You can’t measure self-esteem.

2. You don’t need it to succeed.

3. Self-esteem has nothing to do with your performance in life.

4. Hitler had a very high self-esteem.

5. “He had high self-esteem” is not usually what anyone wants in their obituary.

6. My own self-feeling (a word I prefer) changes moment to moment and day to day.

7. Nothing that changes that much can be worth building on.

8. Work on the skills you want to acquire. Don’t waste your time pursuing the illusion they call “self-esteem.”


Filed under Sadness and Depression

2 responses to “Self Esteem Is Irrelevant

  1. syeda smith

    This makes so much sense to me!

  2. Pingback: Anger is Your Refusal to Experience Grief | Portland Mindfulness Therapy

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